Monday, March 05, 2007

Thunder In The Mountains

So I went dressed as Toyah in her seminal Thunder In The Mountains video complete with a chariot pulled by four handsome white Shetland ponies and it all went rather well.

Actually, I'm reeling in shock from further developments. According to the teacher's report, not only was the other child 'difficult' all day but the teacher witnessed her stabbing a sharp pencil into her leg under the table in class and then blaming it on another child. It's terrible. Then she was seen chasing and repeatedly smacking my son on the bottom in the playground. Naturally, he was running away and got to the end wall where he turned, pushed her and then squished her into the wall to make her stop. Slightly different from an 'un-provoked punch in the stomach'. Then, THEN it turns out that after school the teacher spoke to the mother when she got home to express her worry about the behaviour of their child that day and thought she might not be feeling well - El Barrista father later dialled 1471 and called the teacher back (who is ex-directory) and threatened her saying that unless she did something about the lack of care that the school showed their child then not only was he going to report her to the authorities but 'spread it all over the national newspapers' as well!!! That'll obviously be The Daily Mail and The Express then? I was and still am flabbergasted. The headmistress is furious as of course this without doubt a school matter and not one that should be taken into parents hands without clear facts. So - to cut a long story short - the other girl's parents are in big trouble and the headmistress even went as far to say that they were the bullies here - not the children. I have to say that I completely agree with her. If my child was a bully I think I would be the first to know and to do something about it.

What was even worse was that when I went to pick my son up later this afternoon the mother said hello to me to which I replied walking on the move an extremely bold but curt 'hi'. She then came and stood shoulder to shoulder with me which was really uncomfortable for both of us because I chose to ignore her. I just kept focussed on the door willing it to open so all the kids would come chattering out and save us from this hideous situation. Another mother started talking to me and then my accuser-mum kept chipping in and asking me questions to which I replied monosyllabically. I had to. Here I was standing next to someone who has indirectly been bullying ME and making the most monstrous and potentially damaging accusations against my 5 year old - and what do you do to bullies - ignore them.

Anyway, the up-shot is that it is all probably going to kick off over the next few days as they have been hand-delivered a letter from the headmistress tonight. Me, I'm just being normal and getting on with it but I have to say after the last few days uncertainty and worry I feel suddenly really exhausted, like I've had all the life sucked out of me. An early solid night's sleep beckons methinks. Thank you so much everyone for being so supportive and interested in these posts. I don't normally get as uber personal as this on my blog but this time I felt I had to. Thank you thank you thank you - normal service will resume shortly. The Romo will be back in full effect before long. It takes a lot to get The Rockmother down.



Blogger mad muthas said...

very similar to what happened to me and my son, then. you've got to feel sorry for heads and class teachers having to deal with loonies like that! sounds like you've come out of it with the moral highground - and it seems as if the little girl has lots of problems. mostly her psychodad!

8:31 pm  
Blogger mad muthas said...

meant to say - how's your little boy now? have you managed to help him understand that the problem is with these stupid other people? give him a big friendly hello from us ...

8:57 pm  
Blogger mrsmogul said...

Those London moms can be BITCHES!! I remember getting shoved onto the street by them pushing their strollers like a barrier!

9:12 pm  
Blogger savannah said...

good on ya, rockermom! you took the highroad and you'll be fine, as will your little one because of YOU! i wish you well...

9:15 pm  
Blogger Jane said...

Wow, sounds like that little girl needs a lot of help, closely followed by her father.

Hope it's not all too traumatic for your son now.

9:36 pm  
Blogger rockmother said...

Mutha of Madness - yes it was quite a relief to hand the battle baton over this afternoon. I felt really sorry for the teacher - she was quite upset and I felt really concerned about the girl. He seems to be ok - I've kept it very simple with him really - he doesn't know anything about the parents as I don't think at 5 he would really understand. All he needs to know is that if people bug you find a teacher as soon as you can and don't hit or push anyone if you can help it as it's not nice and gets you into trouble.

Mrs Mogul - welcome - hello - yes, I've been made to walk in the road 8 months pregnant before because a custom-built Landrover buggy has ploughed into me with a vicious looking mother on the end of it!

Savannah - oh thank you that's very sweet - I'm suddenly feeling all emotional now!

Jane - yes! I thought I could call their bluff and alert the social services but quite frankly my priority is my son really - they can just go away and leave us alone.

9:50 pm  
Blogger violetforthemoment said...

Jesus, the dad sounds like a right psycho. I'm sure the teacher could do him for harrassment. Being protective even if your kid's done somthing bad I get, vicitmising five year-olds and spreading vicious rumours about them I don't. Hope things get better for the wee one.

9:59 pm  
Blogger Istvanski said...

Yay for the entire RoMo family!!!

10:54 pm  
Blogger Pod said...

i thought i had posted some supportive words but i cannae see them....i am sure you felt a little pod vibe in the air at some point, even if you thought it was wind (of the internal variety i mean).

that poor child (the little girl). the bottom line is that her behaviour is weird, and hence her parents = weird. she is mirroring her father's pattern. it is verging on something. shame you have copped the brunt of it, but justise will prevail, if all else fails, the toyah get up will shwo 'em who is boss.

rest up love

11:09 pm  
Blogger First Nations said...

you handled this like a champ.
exactly the right thing is what you've done.

stabbing herself in the leg and blaming it on another kid? can you say 'freaky Damian child'? brrrrr.

12:00 am  
Blogger rockmother said...

Violet - basically the Dad has got it really wrong and behaved completely innapropriately. I think the mother is embarrassed - well she seemed embarrassed today but my primary concern is my son and his happiness. I feel desperately sorry for their daughter.

Ister - Up the romo's but I fear it isn't over yet

Pod - hhmmm.....I think I did pick up on something - a swirl of Pod in the air. Another running the gauntlet tomorrow morning - I just KNOW she is going to collar me and it will be very hard. I'm a bit like that - cross me badly and you've had it - the steel shutters come down and they rarely get prised open again unless in extreme extenuating circumstances. I'm very just like that. I can't bear betrayal or injustice of any kind. x

12:04 am  
Blogger rockmother said...

Firsty - whewwww - where've you beeen? Nice to see you here. You are too kind really! I just stayed my course and didn't veer off into hearsay madness like the others. I can be very focussed when I want to. Hope you are well xxx

12:06 am  
Blogger dh said...

Sure the mum is embarassed now but she was probably the one that put hubby up to it. I'd start divorce proceedings if I was him.

1:49 am  
Blogger Arabella said...

I was rooting for the RoMo family today. Big hugaroony.

2:18 am  
Blogger rockmother said...

Dickley - possibly....

Arabella - goodness, that's so nice, thank you x

7:22 am  
Blogger llewtrah said...

With parents like that, no wonder the kids turn out bad. Their child sounds pretty troubled - stabbing a pencil into her leg and blaming it on someone else? Self-harm in kids that young as attention-getting behaviour? I was in primry school with a stinky little girl who did things like that and, in retrospect, I wonder if there was abuse at home.

7:43 am  
Anonymous Jimmy Page's Trousers said...

Hey RM. Glad to hear things are working themselves out. Goodness, rightness and all-round common sense has won the day over tosseriness. Pretty much anyway and it sounds like you've got the worst of it behind you.

Now to fix that ceiling...

8:27 am  
Blogger realdoc said...

It's clear to see where the child got her behaviour from. This barrister father sounds like a complete bully Hope it all gets sorted.

2:57 pm  
Blogger Betty said...

Well, all the other commenters have made good points about the behaviour of the parents and the effect it's probably had on their daughter. Hope you're over the worst of it now.

3:52 pm  
Blogger dh said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

4:33 pm  
Anonymous He who has no kids, at all, anywhere, ever said...

What I hate about grown-ups is the fact that they completely forget what they were like as children. For me, I was faultless, it was always my brothers fault, he started it, he pushed me, I didn't do it. My mother reminded me of this (when she was 85 and I 51) and I suddenly remembered what a shit I was. Children are children and can handle this sort of thing in their stride in their own way. Parents - supposed adults - then believe everything their precious tells them, relates that to their grown-up world and blow the whole thing out of proportion - that's how mountains were made.

I feel for you I really do. I hate grown-ups, I've seen them and don't ever want to be one.

8:04 pm  
Blogger Simon Hilton said...

in undying support of your cause i give you toyh herself....
fondue in the mountains...

1:04 am  
Blogger rockmother said...

Llewtrah - I can't and would not comment - some sort of balance is upset somewhere

Jimmy Pages Bottoms - I suppose the worst is over but it isn't nice having to see the parents every day. Luckily, the ceiling is ok - we whacked the heating up on full and shut the door to the loft therefore creating boiling hot top of the house and bathroom - seemed to dry everything out.

Realdoc - yes - it feels that way - upset me more than I realised at the time. I was really calm and brave when it all kicked off - I feel quite wiped out emotionally at the moment - mind you it's probably because it was a big shock and then three-four days of constant worry.

Betty - thank you so much that's very kind of you Betty

Wavy Gravy Kid - I agree with you - it's nice being a kid and it should stay that way. Maybe see you this summer? x

Eater Algo - god - Toyah - I did feel like that although I bolstered myself up with a bit of very loud Dusty Springfield before I left for the meeting! xx

10:23 am  
Blogger Arabella said...

Thank goodness for Dusty. I do this too, so I have to ask: which track?

3:25 pm  
Blogger rockmother said...

Arabella - Windmills Of Your Mind and Yesterday - really really really loud! Strange isn't it because even though they are usually thought of as maybe quite depressing songs I actually found them very uplifting mainly due to the style of her singing which is incredible. Poor Dusty - she was so great and so sad. I was going to do a little post about her soon once I had decompressed from School Wars which is still making me a bit nrevous of a morning!

5:57 pm  
Blogger Arabella said...

Sounds a great idea.
That's soul for you - the soothing power of pain and regret.
Skips away singing tra la la...

1:58 pm  

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