Friday, September 19, 2008

A Week In My Brain

Woke up at the weekend with the word obfuscate rattling around my brain. God knows why. I have to go and look it up in the dictionary. Definition: To darken; to obscure; to becloud; hence, to confuse; to bewilder. Kind of sums up my life right now. Weird. Went to work - at some point in the day someone mentioned The Feeling - dreadful band - I then have one of their early hits whirling around my brain torturing me for hours. Then I start wondering whether this means they are a good band after all seeing as I can remember the lyrics practically word for word. I don't like The Feeling - why is this happening?


I have been filming for two days under the crackling pylons of Barking and Dagenham. I am convinced the pylons are making my two fillings hurt. It feels like the Bermuda Triangle of lost London. We were filming in a nature reserve nestling amongst the urban sprawl of flattened factories and remediated land that will become 'Barkingside' - a huge housing estate with a lake in the middle. The nature reserve is an interesting place - I saw porn mags and crisp packets in a glade. I saw a lot of evidence of dumping - sad piles of childrens plastic toys unlovingly entwined with dirty clothes and bottles with old piss in them. I saw apple trees, blackberries and rosehips too. I saw bus stops to nowhere and spoke to the armed police unit that regularly patrol the area. I wasn't sure if this made me feel less or more safe to be honest. Then I went for a wee behind a bush and saw a blow-up sex doll that had been strangled with it's own arms. (I have been trying to upload the picture from my phone but fecking bluetooth packed up). The image of sadistic plastic was more than alarming. I suddenly felt as if I was in an out-take of Blair Witch Project gone wrong and went a bit panicky.

Later I turn my attention to ebay - some how I find myself in a bidding war for these:


I didn't win them. Everytime I bid some arse bid £1.00 more. Finally that arse won - her name is stacey666lee. I hate her and hope she breaks her ankle.

Suddenly it's Monday again and when I wake up I sink back into the pillow thinking 'aaahhh' the weekend. Wrong! It's Monday. Oh the pain. On the way to work I see a lady walking down the road hitching up her skirt. It's Soho - there are all sorts at all times of the morning but for some reason I am dreading walking past her. But I do. Off she goes - hitching and hoiking up her skirt. Her knee flesh wobbles like un-cooked cod. My stomach does a grimacy-flutter and I walk on chanting 'oh no oh no oh no'.

This cheers me up



I must do a podcast soon....I really must.

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22 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

Sweet mother of Grolsch, RM, those are some oddly random notions you've got going on. I'm not sure I like the taste of your Thought Soup. I'm more than a little scared.

By the way, if having a song stuck in your head means a band is good after all, last week, Clannad (and their classic theme to Robin of Sherwood) were the best band ever.

8:22 am  
Blogger Momentary Madness said...

A long time ago too long (as it keeps getting longer and worries me--- somebody stop the time) by far it was hip to want to get out of the city and in truth I liked the city with them there hills waiting for me at times of a much needed break. These days I seriously regret not making the move to where (by the time I ready to pop me corks) the pace modern life is slowed down.
I genuinely thought the human race would become more intelligent but instead it just became more clever at being on the make - regardless of - at any cost.

In a way I’m glad the economic investment model has broken down. I only hope it gets fixed properly, but I am pessimistic. Still I hold out for the maxim “in crisis there’s opportunity .”

I was with you in spirit when you stood under the crackling pylons of Barking and Dagenham, the factories - in the land that gave birth to industry, flattened now in sordid remains as - obviously - indeed does the system that supplanted it funny enough. Perhaps you were in a time warp, a meeting of the two worlds one dead the other dying with the promise of a new (won) hosing estate with pond to cover what has been lost.
.... to be con.

8:27 am  
Blogger Geoff said...

Now I've got "Come fill my little world, right up, right up" running through my brain.

They're one of those bands like Toploader that you just wish you'd never heard as they'll be with you on your death bed.

12:21 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That's the trouble with ebay - things rarely go to good homes. I bet Stacey is wearing those shoes to a Showaddywaddy tribute concert.

12:59 pm  
Blogger Betty said...

... in fact, the shoes probably belonged to one of Showaddywaddy. You've had a lucky escape there. Who wants to wear the same shoes as one of Showaddywaddy?

Pylons have scared the shit out of me for years, and I blame that Public Information film where the kiddy is fried alive.

1:04 pm  
Blogger cyrano said...

Pylons what are they good for, absolutely nothing, say it again Ooooooooo!
Yes,...... if you're living beside ......... pylons linked to depression, headaches and memory loss, and .....

"all my pictures have fallen from the wall where I placed them yesterday, I need a crowd of people but I can't face/take them everyday.
Get out of town I think I'll get out of town."

2:29 pm  
Blogger savannah said...

random notions for sure, but hey, sugar, great music to close the set with! xoxoxo (the MITM is sitting across from me, we're both working (ok, he is, i was reading you) and then, bamm...music! we both started chairdancing!!) (and now, back to work)

6:30 pm  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

your head seems like a pretty nice place to be - apart from the toothache. love the shoes! shame you didn't get them. i got hattie some pink leopard-print creepers t'other day - she looks coooooool! i'll send a pic.
the only feeling song i really like is 'sewn' but the video is so freaky, i have to keep leaving the room. xxxx

9:10 pm  
Blogger rockmother said...

Jimmy's Troooserster - well...I've had a funny week. Dear god no - Clannad. Now I'm fending off Enya melodies...noooooo!

Momo Madster - hhmmm...food for thought Momo. The only worry with the opportunity out of crisis is that the opportunists are often the shafters in the long term!

Geoffster - UGH - TOPLOADER! Shit band, shit name for a band, shit songs, just generally shit really. Terrible isn't it? Seven Seas by the Goombay Dance Band is one to send you quite mad too.

Arabellakins - yes - and she has blisters on the back of her heels as a result. She has saved me in the long run from more potential mutton-ness...x

Bettster - yes - perhaps it was the one with big ginger hair - Donald? Showaddywaddy. I have only just realised what a preposterous name that is for a band - apart from Toploader or The Coral of course. Hate The Coral too. Oh that public information film was terrifying - I remember the kite dangling from the evil pylon. When I was young I used to think pylons were like people and walked across the land at night when we weren't looking. I want my mum!

Cyranoness - pylons are good for crackling and for birds to have a rest and a chat on - how come they don't get fried when they sit on the lines?

Savmarshmamama - yep - Edwin Starr was a duuude - I love that track. Glad you had a good chairdance. xx

Rivergirlie - oh I bet Hattie looks fab! xx

10:53 pm  
Blogger cyrano said...

Circuits, what are they good for,
absolutely shocking,
say it again
absolutely shocking.

Birds land directly on the wire: no circuit: like they say about me: no feet on the ground, if the bird touched the pylon/frame and the wire at the same time he’d be in Kentucky (boom) post haste.

if you could jump straight up on the wire you would be just "like a bird on a wire, like a drunk in some mid-night choir you have tried in you way to be free.

4:28 am  
Blogger Suzy Norman said...

I'm quite intrigued by those human/dumping wasteland places. Lots of imagery for a visual person like you to capture.
JPEGZ PLZ.

7:34 am  
Blogger Dick Headley said...

You can't fool me rockmum....it's all a way of keeping your mind off Sarah Palin.

2:22 pm  
Blogger Mondo said...

Barking and Dagenham? - It's like a safari park there, you'd be better off visiting the swamp dwellers (like me) in sunny Southend (well, I'm Leigh actually).

Can't blame stacey666lee for snapping those boots up - have you checked TUK shoes good selection at great prices I bought some of these in the sale recently

2:34 pm  
Blogger Annie said...

I'm glad you posted the shoes and not the sex doll, that sounds v creepy. Oh noes, waking up thinking it's the weekend and it's Monday, how horrible! It's the bad flipside of waking early then realising it's the weekend, which is lovely...

podcast podcast podcast! Do me a request, I don't mind what...

7:25 pm  
Blogger Axe Victim said...

Hmmm stacy666lee did you a bit of a favour dear.

BTW PM - that's a pub shoe innit?

8:46 pm  
Blogger realdoc said...

Yes you must do a podcast.

10:07 am  
Blogger Piley said...

i can confirm that the feeling are indeed shite... easy listening pop pap m'dear!

and as for the shooz, would you have worn em with those leggin things you bought a few months back???!!

P

8:44 pm  
Blogger Momentary Madness said...

Friday. Can I come out of your brain now?
I feel recharged.

8:25 am  
Blogger Axe Victim said...

Remind my missus to show you the zebra print boots I bought her that she never wears! They might fit you my dear.

4:07 pm  
Blogger rockmother said...

Cyranoness - aah - now I understand - thank you. I was too busy humming pop songs and daydreaming to myself in physics when we did electronic current stuff.

The Empress Who Is Roman - yes I am too. If I can get them off my phone I will I promise - especially the one of the self-strangled sex doll!

Darling Dickley - I think about Sarah Palin daily - she needs to go back on the spaceship she came in on. Close Encounters of the Awful Kind.

Mr Mondo Bongo - eevil Stacey 666 - yes - I've had a look at TUK - I think I am having a mid-life crisis and want to go back to 1978. I better be careful - I'll end up looking like a cross between Vivienne Westwood and Nicky Haslam if I'm not careful! We had some of our electrical lighting cables nicked by thieving pikeys on the shoot surprise surprise. Oh well.

Lovely Gorgeous Annie - will do will do - I shall do you a wonderful dedication x

Mr Axe Minster - yes - I think she prob did in the long run - damn - I was going to wear them to your gig!

Realdoc - blinking heck Realdoc - how the devil are you? Seeing as you are a proper doctor I shall feel obliged to obey. Lots of love x

Piley - hah! now how did I know you would ask that question?! Well the simple answer is NO! Absolutely NOT! I'm not that mutton you know - just muttonlite and quite obviously deluded ;-)

Momodarling - no - you can bloody well stay there and sweep up the crumbs from all those credit crunch biscuits you've been eating all week! Have a nice glass of Fleurie while you are at it though. (Sneaks away desperately trying to think of something to write about)..

Mr Axe Victim - zebra print boots? hhmmm...I don't blame her for not wearing them...bit of a statement boot - that's why Stacey did me a favour....

4:48 pm  
Blogger Dick Headley said...

Don't worry about Palin rm. Something tells me she may soon 'step down to spend more time with her family.'

6:05 pm  
Blogger rockmother said...

Dickley - I had an interesting e mail from a US colleague yesterday who said his septugenarian parents have been voting Republican all their lives and are now for the first time voting Democrat - never say never.

8:30 am  

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